"Provisional" 2015 oil on canvas 30" x 24"
Provisional (adj): existing for the present time but likely to be changed; temporary
The duality of representation and abstraction is still tumbling around in my brain. Finding a place of peaceful coexistence for the two seems to be a recurring theme. Being an "observational painter" is so intrinsically a part of my identity; I don't think I could change that if I tried. The challenge in moving forward has been finding ways to creatively break the (arbitrary) rules I have laid out for myself as an artist. Painting this studio ephemera - recreating the random marks on the walls and floor - has, in part, allowed me to make abstract paintings that still follow my "rules."
I crave the freedom in color and mark-making that this process affords me. Yet I could never be a "provisional painter." The desire to make an image that is thoroughly and recognizably grounded in reality is too strong to ever be completely overcome. At the same time, I can't honestly call myself a strict "realist" - my deep and abiding love for the materiality of paint is, also, too strong to ever be erased.
Balance. Elusive as ever.
Perhaps the answer lies in the next piece. Or the one after that...